Reactions

"I have lupus."
"Uh wha?"
"Long explanation of lupus."

Acceptable responses:
1) "Dude you are a wreck." (my personal preference)
2) (If you have the need to be sympathetic) "Aw I'm sorry. My aunt has that. It sucks."

Unacceptable responses:
1) "Oh my god. I am SO sorry. Oh man. But you're so young. That's just terrible. I'm so sorry. I mean, that's horrible - you're like, what, twenty? That's so unfair. Are you okay? It just sounds awful" with a teary look in your eyes.

While I do not want to speak for all lupies, I want to say for myself that I have plenty of guilt for worrying my family and friends and I really, really, REALLY do not need to feel as though I have just torn your heart apart. What's more, I have no way to react to that except to kind of smile, shrug, and say "oh it's fine, really." Yick.

One other thing: If you are, say, a dentist, and a lupie has just given you her medical history, and she happens to not be on meds, the best response is NOT "I'm sorry to hear you have lupus - but you've never exhibited any symptoms, right?" First of all, look at all the boxes I've checked for "things I have/have had" and second of all, whoa, way to cut me off at the knees.

Basically what I'm trying to say is that the dentist's office failed my reaction test. I had the practically-crying nurse (? the dentist equivelant of?) followed by the your-disease-is-just-a-concept-without-reality dentist.